Power and Control

 Projection is quite vividly seen throughout our lives, others may not even recognize the projection they impose on others. 

According to the GoodTherapy blog, "Projection is a psychological defense mechanism in which individuals attribute characteristics they find unacceptable in themselves to another person."

Have you ever been in a situation or conversation in which a person reacts strongly emotionally to a comment of yours?

At first, it can be confusing but this projection that others do can be underlying insecurities or triggers that have not been addressed by the individual themselves. 

But, why do people project on to others? and are they fully aware of themselves when they do the projection?

The projection can be seen in three different forms (via GoodTherapy blog): 

1. Neurotic projection is the most common variety of projection and most clearly meet the definition of a defense mechanism. In this type of projection, people may attribute feelings, motives, or attitudes they find unacceptable in themselves to someone else.
2. Complementary projection occurs when individuals assume others feel the same way they do. For example, a person with a particular political persuasion might take it for granted that friends and family members share those beliefs.
3. Complimentary projection is the assumption other people can do the same things as well as themselves. For example, an accomplished pianist might take it for granted that other piano students can play the piano equally well.

I've also been diving into psychoanalysis readings like Bob Hoffman, "No One is To Blame". Although this specific piece focuses on the parental figures of individuals' lives and their long-term influence on our adulthood. The study goes into depth about lovelessness and how this lack of nurture from childhood can train individuals to always use self-destructive methods to obtain control of the love others give to them. 

According to Hoffman, "The negative love syndrome is the single most destructive force in marriage, sexuality, work, health, and play" (Hoffman, 20). 

Therefore, projection of anger, hatred and other negative emotions can be a huge identifier of the family structure individuals grew up believing love meant. 

An example is a child mocking their parents passive-aggressiveness to each other or vulgar conversations that are exchanged with each other on a daily basis. Depending on the reaction of each parent, either if they laugh it off (approving and praising the mockery) or reacting in disgust (noticing their behavior impact on the child). The child will learn to either continue the behavior trait as a normal reaction/interaction to others. 

I have yet to finish the Hoffman reading and I'll continue my analysis of his points in another blog post. However, I felt the need to share a piece of his findings to relate to the overall picture of projection and its foundation that isn't often discussed. 

Projection can be a gateway for individuals to analyze themselves at a deeper subconscious level especially to evaluate the relationships surrounding them. Often, we can find ourselves falling for the same type of friendships or relationships, not realize they mock the relationships we witnessed growing up. Either, we are the individuals seeking control and power or giving the power and control to others who we are trying to fix.